November 10, 2011

Yu-Gi-Oh Inspiration

This is from my Facebook dated 8-30-11

While waiting for our pizza for dinner,Pacey decided that today was the day. Now was the time. This conversation was not only imperative and urgent but a matter of life and death in the 4th grade kingdom.

Yu-Gi-Oh cards, the appdrent equivalent to crack to 4th grade testosterone fueled mini men in training.


I'm a girl. I don't understand this nonsense. Special attacks,rare cards, limited edition foil cards that shimmer and shine. I prefer my shimmer and shine in the form of diamonds and platinum ... but I digress.

Not only is my son driven by the pure and unchallenged allure and magic of these said cards,I am pretty sure he is the pusher of this 4th grade card epidemic taking over recess and all the mini men in training that he encounters.

I'm dealing with his Yu-Gi-Oh "Godfather" status. I figure a few bowls of lucky charms will dull the confusion, we will see.

As I am processing these insightful and truly captivating words,he pulls out the big guns.

"Ya know Mom, at Target for only 19.99 they have this gold box with black on the front and a large red dragon on it. Its full of important and crucial cards. I'm getting good grades and umm...I have allowance."

This kid is cute. I don't think he fully comprehends that I've been at this begging thing way longer than he has. I literally want to squeeze the hell out of him. I love that kid. And yes,the con artist will most likely get his fix.....I mean CARDS!

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Youthful Novelty

The fabulous Miss Sophie Anabelle has a black Halloween shirt with bones,candy, all that nonsense. She wore it today for the first time....yeah, AFTER Halloween. Aside from the fact the shirt had glitter on it,she didn't take notice of much else.

Sophie and I took the pug alliance out to make a sissy (pug pee pee) and came back in. While its colder than the north effin pile outside,it is sunny. I managed to wiggle a miracle out of Miss Thang and negotiate a nap for a pair of new shoes. Listen,what she doesn't know is that I was going to purchase her some snazzy new kicks anyway so really, I win and and she has healthy delusions of winning. As Charlie Sheen would say,"I'm bi-winning! I'm winning here....I'm winning there!"

I'm snuggled in the double papasan chair with the flat faces and Sophie when she declares she too must make a sissy. Oy! She wiggled free of our furry and sleepy snuggles and prances down the hallway gleefully.

Less than a minute later....a shrill,blood curdling scream. All of us shoot up and are haul assing down the dayum hallway to find Sophie ushering us all into the bathroom,shutting the door and turning off the light.

Now I couldn't see the pugs as we were in the dark but I'm fairly sure they were saying,"Uh mom, this is harshing our morning mellow...Wtf dood ( pug for dude)."

Apparently, the skeletal system on this old navy shirt glows in the dark. The pug nation cannot see their little girl but they do see floating and glowing bones! Gah! They go past batshit and go immediately into apeshit crazy status. Trudy is howling, Cullen is screaming, Joey couldn't care less and plops his round ass on my feet. Bella goes bananas barking as if her noise level will somehow earn her unlimited arby's roast beef sandwiches. All this commotion leads little baby Otto to violently piss down the front of my way cute Hollister shirt. Sweet hell. You can scare the piss out of a pug,FYI.

So, if any of yall are wondering, I'd urge you not to shut your pugs in a dark bathroom with you if there is any indication that glowing items will be present. Oy!

Oh, Happy Thursday!!

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